Okay, lets face it, having the privilege to call yourself a wife and a mom isn’t always glamorous. Especially if you are a “stay at home” mom. Especially if you are a “have a job” mom. Especially if you are a ” teach your own kids school” mom. It’s all hard, tiresome work. We moms know what it is like to be utterly and completely exhausted. We are spent. Their isn’t anything left for us to give at the end of the day.
Do you know what advise your husband probably got before he married you? “Hey, don’t get married and have kids! Do you know what that means?!!” And with raised eyebrows they say, “No more sex.” They shake their heads with horrified eyes, “Don’t do it,. I’m speaking from experience, man.” And your fiancé triumphantly thinks, “That’s not going to happen to me. My sweetie loves me!”
Well, yes. Of course you love your husband. That hasn’t stopped just because you got married and had kids. If anything, it has intensified your love. After all, everything you do everyday comes from a loving heart. “There just isn’t enough of me to go around.”, you may say. “I just can’t do it all.”
Here is where your journey starts. You may ask, “What are you talking about? I have been on my journey the day I got married!” I say, “Yes, you have been on your own journey, by yourself, working hard, all on your little lonesome. Just you and you.” How is that working out for you?
Until anyone comes to the place where they say, “I can’t do this anymore. I need help. I need advise. I’m ready to learn.” Then and only then are they truly ready to get wisdom from someone who has been in their place many times before. Someone who understand. Someone who has made it through with Help.
1. I would say first and foremost on your journey, you need to realize that we live in a fallen world. We are going to fail. Our husband is going to fail. And our children will try to embarrass and harass us at every turn. It is what it is.
2. So how do we live in this fallen world with all these failing people? First God commands us to love them. Not love them for what they do for us. Not love them when they perform the way we think they should. Not love ourselves only when we do what we think we should. Who is being the judge here? Who is deciding what is acceptable and what is not? Who is the one that needs to be satisfied in order to have peace and joy?
3. God is the judge. Not us. What is He like? Well, He loves everyone for who they are. He never forces anyone to love Him. He woos us all with His love for us. He gives all a choice to set their eyes on Him and obey Him because they want to. Sounds so peaceful, right? That is the plan for all mankind. Peace and joy in Him who loves us.
4. Rest is Jesus. He gave you the husband you have. He gave you the children you have. Your husband is a child of God. You are a child of God. Your children are God’s children. Trust your Heavenly Father. He knows what is best and loves you all more than you can imagine. “Set your affections on things above….” He tells us. Where is your focus? Where is your devotion? Where is your allegiance? Where is your sanctuary?
5. Entrust your responsibility as a wife and mother to the One who has given you the job. He is the one responsible. He is the one who will give you everything you need to do the job. It’s not about doing the job perfect. It’s about doing the job with the right focus and motive. When your focus is on yourself and how you are going to do the right thing, you will fail and beat yourself up every time. This gets depressing. This isn’t fun. This isn’t God’s plan. His plan is for you to keep your eyes on Him. What would you have me to do? What would you have me to say? What is the best way to handle this situation?
6. This is a moment by moment relationship. Start on your journey today. You will be amazed at how much control you are clutching to. You will be amazed at how much God loves you. You will be amazed at how close you can become to your Creator. It is amazing! Just start. “What would you have me to do right now, Lord?” Then simply obey. Live in the present. What is going on right now? Because God is in the “right now.” There and only there will you find Him. Take the step of faith for a life of faith. It’s worth it!